No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
