are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
