By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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