Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
