that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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