and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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