Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Sorry about my life...
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
