I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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