If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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