You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
