jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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