Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
