Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
