We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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