I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
