i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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