Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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