I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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