Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
