Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize