It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
