the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
