Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
