after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
