why didn't you poke me back
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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