we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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