i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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