Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I don't deserve a penis
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Randomize
