mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
