Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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