awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
