Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
