Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Randomize
