kristin has been a bad kristin
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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