Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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