I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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