Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
