He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
