Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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