your room smells of hookers.
And success
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
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