What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
