Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
