im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
two words...techno handjob
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
