you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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