this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
