so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
