He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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