So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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