When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
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