I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize