you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
